One year after the murder of George Floyd, America’s season of racial reckoning rolls on.

Photo by ev on Unsplash

I have been trying to write this piece for almost four months. For very nearly 12 months the United States has been grappling with a season of racial reckoning as evermore stories of police brutality, particularly against Black people, have come to light and mass protest movements have sprung up to advocate for change.

In June 2020 I wrote an article for the Odyssey Online that detailed some of my thoughts in the most immediate aftermath of the murder of George Floyd and the Black Lives Matter activism that followed. In truth, I was late to the party then too…


Acts of God

The deity responsible for extensive hurricane damage in the Big Easy denies any wrongdoing in this latest inferno.

Photo by Marcos Paulo Prado on Unsplash

NEW ORLEANS, LA — A fire broke out at the Superdome in New Orleans Tuesday, extending a recent string of bad luck for the city stretching back decades.

According to local firefighting authorities, a team of cleaners hired by stadium management consortium ASM Global was pressure washing the ceiling of the structure early this week in an effort to remove dirt and debris left from last month’s crippling tropical storm, Hurricane Ida.

Unfortunately, those plans went awry.

Shortly after 2:00 PM local time, a pressure washer caught fire and was incinerated in a conflagration that proved fatal to the machine…


Work

A woman’s “commendable work ethic” was rewarded with a bonus that’ll cover the cost of diapers for one month.

Photo by Skyler Gerald on Unsplash

GREENSBORO, NC — A waitress at a Waffle House on Dudley Road got a fantastic little surprise during her shift late yesterday afternoon.

Working a double shift while also caring for her newborn daughter, Sheryl Lacy served a certain famous country musician a Super-Star Triple-Team All-Slam Grand Deluxe breakfast platter while juggling her various responsibilities.

The country star in question was so impressed by her work ethic, he decided to tip $1000 on the $0.99 order.

“It does feel good,” Lacy reported to a local CBS affiliate. “It feels good to be seen. It would also feel good to not…


Home Remodeling

A Michigan native made a striking discovery while renovating a back patio.

Photo by Brad Preece on Unsplash

DETROIT, MI — A Michigan man was wracked by feelings of unbridled angst and horror earlier this week when he unearthed 160 bowling balls from beneath his back patio.

Digging up space underneath his back steps this past weekend to make way for a planned expansion of his quaint one-story bungalow, the man in question was shocked to see the gaudy, humanoid “faces” of the aforementioned sporting goods leering up at him.

“I never wanted to be ‘that guy,’” the man expressed with unsteady breath. “Never wanted to be that guy from the math problems. ‘Dude loads 79 watermelons into…


Spiritualism

Executives say Pennsylvania police were wrong to remove ritualists.

Photo by Alex Jones on Unsplash

DICKSON CITY, PA — Home Depot executives are apologizing to the spiritualist community today after an incident early last week where local police were called to a store on Commerce Boulevard and asked by store management to remove a group of people performing an “exorcism.” The demonstrators claimed that their ritual was meant to “cleanse the dead trees” and to “set their spirits free.” Some in the party said that they were concerned about the possibility of “demonic possession” stemming from unsettled spirits still trapped inside the company’s two-by-fours.

“What transpired today at the Lackawanna County location is inexcusable,” Home…


Football

Gay people have existed in the NFL for decades

Photo by Ben Hershey on Unsplash

When Las Vegas Raiders defensive end Carl Nassib came out as gay on Instagram Monday, it may not have initially seemed like much. In a world where the fight for marriage equality has been realized and where prominent figures such as Elliot Page and Demi Lovato frequently come to the fore with revelations about their gender identity or sexual orientation, one modestly successful athlete on a mediocre team coming out of the closet can feel like watered-down news. Joy Behar crudely said as much on The View yesterday morning.

Yet, Nassib’s announcement is significant for a few reasons. Namely, it…


Together in Business

Analysts split over ‘togetherness’

Vin Diesel at movie premiere; Andre Luis — Creative Commons

NEW YORK, NY — Shares of AMC (NYSE: AMC) surged nearly 69% today as Vin Diesel made a special guest appearance in an AMC Theaters commercial to promote his new movie, F9, and to encourage movie lovers to come back to the cinema.

“It’s truly incredible,” Mr. Diesel said in the commercial. “There’s nothing quite like going to the movies.”

Particular to Mr. Diesel’s personal brand and the message imparted by the film and its prequels, the commercial highlighted aspects of “love” and “friendship” by showing Mr. Diesel hugging patrons as they entered an AMC theater.

“I love you, and…


Chinese nationalists pushed back after Cena referred to Taiwan as a country. Americans were just as upset when he apologized.

Image by hiten326 from Pixabay

I don’t care about fast cars. Or, at the very least, I don’t care about fast cars as much as the average twentysomething man. And while the Fast & Furious movies have long ceased just being about fast cars (trading in now on people doing absolutely ludicrous things in fast cars) their appeal is still impactful, in my demographic and beyond.

So, when the new star villain of the latest Fast film, John Cena, made headlines last week by referring to Taiwan as a “country” in an interview with a Taiwanese news outlet (an interview which the former pro wrestler…


Literature

USPS commends ‘brave’ effort to return misdelivered letter

Photo by Mick Haupt on Unsplash

An area man reported unbridled feelings of elation which he equated with the joy that must’ve existed in Charles Dickens’ Victorian England as he chased down his local postman to return a wrongly delivered letter earlier this week.

“There’s just nothing quite like it, jaunting barefoot upon the pavement, soot on your nose. It makes me feel like I ought to go sweep a chimney or something,” the man stated.

When asked why it was that he felt the need to compare his experience to the work of the famed English novelist, the man said, “He wrote good books and…


In a world such as ours, it’s no wonder that questions are being asked from all angles.

Amanda Gorman at the inauguration of Joe Biden; Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff — Creative Commons

When Amanda Gorman took to the steps of the United States Capitol Building on January 20th, I, like most, was astounded by her resplendent air. Her bright yellow peacoat flowing down from her dark visage, her braids bound with a bloodred hairband, I don’t believe it insincere to say that she was the most profound woman present at the inauguration of President Joe Biden.

Yet, far be it from me, a straight White man, to base Gorman’s profundity simply on her appearance. What spilled from her lips that day was far more magical than all the rest combined. Reciting her…

Noah Lorey

Proud Cheeshead, D&D enthusiast, and movie buff. A writer by day and actually still a writer at night (for what it’s worth).

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